just right. Theirs is a gesture of love, surely, but also a gesture of what might be called obsessive parenting. (Obsessive parents know who they are and are generally proud of the fact; non-obsessive parents also know who the obsessives are and tend to snicker at them.) Most innovations in the field of child safety are affiliated with- shock of shocks-a new product to be marketed. (Nearly five million car seats are sold each year.) These products are often a response to some growing scare in which, as Peter Sandman might put it, the out- rage outweighs the hazard. Compare the four hundred lives that a few swimming pool precautions might save to the number of lives saved by far noisier crusades: child-resistant packaging (an estimated fifty lives a year), flame-retardant pajamas (ten lives), keeping children away from airbags in cars (fewer than five young children a year have been killed by airbags since their introduction), and safety draw- strings on childrens clothing (two lives). Hold on a minute, you say. What does it matter if parents are ma- nipulated by experts and marketers? Shouldnt we applaud any effort, regardless of how minor or manipulative, that makes even one child safer? Dont parents already have enough to worry about? After all, parents are responsible for one of the most awesomely important feats we know: the very shaping of a childs character. Arent they?       The most radical shift of late in the conventional wisdom on parent- ing has been provoked by one simple question: how much do parents really matter? Clearly, bad parenting matters a great deal. As the link between   abortion and crime makes clear, unwanted children-who are dispro- portionately subject to neglect and abuse-have worse outcomes than children who were eagerly welcomed by their parents. But how much can those eager parents actually accomplish for their childrens